Sweet Revenge
by my-chemical-romanoff
Summary: Natasha is the only one who can keep Loki from his beloved sweets. Fluff. One shot. Blackfrost.


He always ate her desserts.

Natasha never minded at first. He always stole a single cookie or a homemade cinnamon roll-anything that he could easily claim as a miscounting error, or went missing in the stomach of a fellow teammate. Natasha didn't bake often, only around the holidays, so she always let it slide.

It wasn't until one particular Thanksgiving Eve when Loki boldly cut himself the tiniest sliver of pumpkin pie. Natasha knew he was the culprit when she opened the fridge the next morning to find eight slices of pie already plated and topped with whipped cream. Loki claimed he was 'helping' and 'making her pie presentable.' But Natasha didn't buy it. She took an empty pie pan and pieced the slices together. Needless to say, she wasn't surprised when she discovered the slightest fraction missing.

This Christmas, Natasha was going to teach Loki a lesson in eating his dessert before finishing his dinner. Or in his case, breakfast. No more late night snacking for a certain trickster.

"What is that?" Loki asked as he sauntered into the kitchen one December afternoon. The sweet smell of chocolate beckoned him like a moth to a flame.

"A Yule log," Natasha announced as she worked on mixing the cake batter. Her first dessert of the Christmas season was going to be the best yet.

"A log?" he blinked.

"It's cake shaped like a log." She held up her whisk to let Loki test the batter.

He leaned over Natasha's shoulder and eagerly licked up some chocolate. "Delicious," he hummed.

"Let's let it bake and I'll show you how it rolls up," she grinned. Natasha didn't mind showing the god the secret to giving the holiday cake its signature swirl in the middle.

Loki gladly helped with icing the baked sheet cake. He was even more interested in watching Natasha roll it all up in a compacted cylinder.

"Then we ice it to make it look like a log." Natasha noticed Loki licking his lips as she began spreading dark chocolate icing over the cake. She finished it off by creating some indents with a knife, followed by a generous sprinkle of sugar to act as snow, then some berries for decoration. "And we'll have this for dessert tomorrow night," she winked.

"Can I not try a slice?" he wondered, unable to hide the disappointment in his tone.

"You can't cut it until you serve it," she informed him. "Besides, the cake has to harden in the fridge."

Loki had never heard of such a custom. Nonetheless, that wasn't going to stop him from stealing a bite after Natasha had fallen asleep. "Alright."

Late into the night, long after Natasha was asleep, Loki left their bed to sneak into the dark kitchen. He opened the fridge and there on the center shelf was the Yule log, basking under a pale yellow glow. Loki carefully lifted the plate up and carried it over to the counter. He quietly grabbed a fork and proceeded to cut off a small chunk from the log's lower corner. It took some force, but he finally had himself a decent bite's worth. Natasha wasn't joking about the cake hardening. He brought the fork to his lips and greedily took his first bite of Christmas dessert. The sweet frosting instantly melted on his tongue. His teeth bit down, but instead of tasting the lush chocolate, he was hailed with dry sawdust. He spit the piece out onto the floor, too disgusted to reach for a napkin. Tiny woodchips were still stuck in his molars and along his tongue, even after rinsing with a cup of tap water. _Yule__** log**_… he reminded himself. There had to be some kind of mistake. Perhaps Natasha's cake hardened wrong. He most certainly saw his beloved chocolate cake being rolled up earlier. Loki found a knife and messily cut off another chunk. He held the piece between his fingers as he went to turn on the kitchen light. The frosting was definitely real, but the cake itself… soggy, discoloured wood…

"Looks like someone tried to sneak some sweets again."

Loki whipped his head around at the sound of Natasha's voice.

Her eyes narrowed as she folded her arm across her chest. "You're a grown man, Loki," she warned. "You get dessert when it's time for dessert."

"A trick?" He flicked the chocolate covered sawdust at the ground. "Do you find it amusing to constantly deceive me?" he frowned.

The corner of her lip raised in a playful smirk. "Only when you deserve it."

"Where is the true cake?" he demanded.

Natasha sauntered towards him to grab his arm. "Safe from _you_. Now get back to bed," she ordered, yanking his arm forward. "You'll wait for it just like everyone else."


End file.
